SCRIPTURE: Song of Songs 8:6-7; Ephesians 5:22-33 (ESV)
DATE: 6-19-22
As always it’s a joy to be with all of you this weekend at Gateway Church. And there’s one thing I want you to know — and this is true if you’re worshiping with us for the first time or are joining us at our North Main campus — I want you to know that God loves you and that I love you too.
SERIES INTRODUCTION
We’re in the final week of our Finding Jesus series. Each week — in this series — I’ve introduced you to a book of the Bible that you may or may not have been familiar with. I’ve given an overview of the book and then we’ve focused on a section of each of the books. And what I hope has been most helpful — is me showing you how to find Jesus in each of the books. I’ve shown you how to find the one story the whole Bible is telling — the story of Jesus — because the whole Bible is ultimately pointing us to him.
And in this year’s iteration of our Finding Jesus series — we’ve been looking at five books in the Old Testament often called the Wisdom literature. And — today — we’re looking at the book titled the Song of Songs. So if you have your Bible, please turn with me to chapter 8 of the Song of Songs.
In previous weeks we’ve looked at the books of Job, Psalms, Proverbs, and Ecclesiastes. And this is the week — parents — that I’ve been warning you about for the last four weeks. So I hope you’re prepared to potentially have “the talk” with your children — if they’re sitting with you — or now’s the time to go check them in to Kidway if you’re not ready to have “the talk” yet. This is a judgment free zone — no one will think any less of you if you need to make a quick exit right now.
And my hope for all of us — in this series — is that we’ll grow to know and love these books and spend time in them — finding Jesus — and the joy that’s found only in him.
BACKGROUND OF SONG OF SONGS
So let’s take some time to get our bearings in the Song of Songs — and I hope you’ll see that this is a book you’ll want to go read for yourself.
First, what do we know about this book — for example — who wrote it? Solomon — king of Israel — the son of King David — wrote the Song of Songs. In verse 1 of the book we read, “The Song of Songs, which is Solomon’s.” In this opening verse we find both the title of the book and its author. Now — there are some who doubt Solomon’s authorship because this book focuses on the intimate and passionate love between one man and one woman. And this causes some to doubt Solomon as the author because — if you don’t know — he had 700 wives and 300 concubines. Not exactly the guy you’d expect to write a song about the love between him and one woman!
Yet Solomon’s authorship is interwoven throughout the book as he’s mentioned numerous times — by name — in the Song. And — in taking Solomon to be the author — we then have the time period in which our book was written — for we know when Solomon lived. He was king of Israel from 971 to 931 BC.
Now that we know who wrote the book — and when the book was written — and even where we get the title for the book — what about why — why was this book written — what’s the point of the Song of Songs?
Well our question is answered by recognizing that the Song of Songs is a difficult book to interpret. In fact — there are a few different views on how to interpret the book — the debate being over whether this book is to be interpreted literally, allegorically, or should it be interpreted using some kind of combination of the two? And how we answer this interpretation question will lead us to answering the question of why the book was written.
If taken literally, this is the Bible’s love manual — and yes — we’re talking about sex. As one person has said, “The Song fills a necessary vacuum in the Scriptures because it endorses sex and celebrates it beyond all expectation. Although abuse is possible and is to be avoided, sex is not inherently evil, nor is it limited to a procreative function. Instead, sex enables an experience of love whose intensity has no parallel in this cosmos…”
And — some of you may be thinking — “I never knew this was in the Bible. If I had — I’d have been reading my Bible more regularly!” And — if you had been — you’d have read…
- Kiss me and kiss me again, for your love is sweeter than wine. – 1:2
- And…The king has brought me into his bedroom. – 1:4b
- The king is lying on his couch, enchanted by the fragrance of my perfume. 13 My lover is like a sachet of myrrh lying between my breasts. – 1:12-13
- And you’d have read…As an apricot tree stands out in the forest, my lover stands above the young men in town. All I want is to sit in his shade, to taste and savor his delicious love. He took me home with him for a festive meal, but his eyes feasted on me! Oh! Give me something refreshing to eat — and quickly! Apricots, raisins — anything. I’m about to faint with love! His left hand cradles my head, and his right arm encircles my waist! – 2:3-6
- And there are many more examples of the passionate, intimate, physical, and sexual love between the man and woman in this song. Again, this is a passionate, intimate, physical, and sexual love being described between the man and woman.
Now — this kind of literal interpretation of the Song — has always been around throughout the book’s history — but this kind of interpretation seems to have really grown in popularity in recent years — especially here in the US — and I wonder if this has anything to do with our nation having become more and more sexualized. Pastors and Bible teachers have used the Song of Songs as a text to teach and preach on sex — especially appealing to the inundation of erotic sex we’re overwhelmed by in our culture. Christians want to know if it’s OK to do this or that in the bedroom and the Song of Songs is often turned to as a sex manual — again — if we take a literal approach to interpreting the book.
There’s also an interpretive thread of the Song — throughout Jewish and Christian history — that’s allegorical. Where the man and the woman represent God and Israel — that’s the Jewish tradition — or Christ and the Church — the Christian tradition. Where — given that the Song of Songs is a song — and songs have much in common with poetry, right — which means that a literal interpretation may miss the point of the literary genre of the book.
Where — just like taking a poem literally often means you miss the point of the poem — some argue that interpreting the Song of Songs literally means you miss the actual point of the book because of its literary genre.
But — if we return to the quote I read earlier — I intentionally left off the ending the first time I shared it with you. Here’s the quote in full. “The Song fills a necessary vacuum in the Scriptures because it endorses sex and celebrates it beyond all expectation. Although abuse is possible and is to be avoided, sex is not inherently evil, nor is it limited to a procreative function. Instead, sex enables an experience of love whose intensity has no parallel in this cosmos and serves as a signpost to point to the greater love that lies beyond it.”
And this is where we discover that — the best way to interpret the Song of Songs — is by combining both a literal and an allegorical approach.
The Christian faith is not anti-sex — not even anti-enjoying sex between a husband and wife. But — since Jesus has said that all of Scripture is ultimately about him — then even this song of love is meant to point us to him which — as we’ll see — is exactly what the Song does.
OVERVIEW OF SONG OF SONGS
So that’s the bird’s eye view of what’s going on. Now, let’s turn to the book itself. The book has 8 chapters with 117 verses — by far the shortest book in the Old Testament wisdom literature. And the book is difficult to outline because it keeps weaving in and out of the Song with a form that isn’t as clear as the songs we sing today. Songs today usually have a verse — then a chorus — then another verse — then back to the chorus — then maybe to a bridge — then back to the chorus for a final time or two. The Song doesn’t have this kind of clean form to it.
Yet — something intriguing about some commentaries — is that a few divide the book into three sections in an attempt to follow the relationship between the man and the woman in the Song.
For example, Chapters 1, 2, and the beginning of chapter 3 describe their courtship. The rest of chapter 3 — along with chapter 4 — describe the couple’s wedding. With the rest of the book taking us through their married life. When you read the book for yourself — see if you’re able to follow a similar outline of their relationship throughout the Song.
But a helpful way to understand the book — is to be aware of a theme found throughout the Bible. The theme is that of a marriage covenant — and how a marriage covenant relates to sexual intimacy. We see this established back in the book of Genesis when Adam responds to God creating Eve with the words, ““This at last is bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man.” 24 Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh.”
The “one flesh” language — used here — refers to sexual intimacy between Adam and Eve. But it’s sexual intimacy in the context of a covenantal relationship. God created Eve for Adam to be his helpmate — to be his wife — to be his lifelong partner. So — no casual sex here — but sex in the context of a lifelong committed God-glorifying marriage. A relationship established by and in the presence of God — which is consummated — or completed — by sexual intimacy.
And the idea of marriage being a life-long covenant between one man and one woman — and especially regarding the enjoyment of sexual intimacy only in the context of marriage — well — this is an idea lost in the oversexualized culture of our day.
Yet — biblically — this is the only context for a sexual relationship according to God. It’s to be within a covenant relationship. A covenant — by the way — is an “oath-bound relationship.” Think of it as “a promise — between two or more parties.”
If you’re familiar with the Bible — you may be thinking of different covenants that are in Scripture — the first being the covenant between God and Adam in the Garden. Or God’s covenant with Noah — when God said never again will he destroy the world by a flood. Or God’s covenant with Moses or David or the New Covenant. When you think of a covenant you may think of one of these covenants that are between God and man.
But covenants can also be between people — and marriage is one such example. Where marriage is seen as a binding oath — a promise not to be broken by either husband or wife. And — again — I don’t think it takes much looking around at the world we live in to see that marriage — at least today by many — is seen as something less than a covenant — for marriages come to an end seemingly as often as they begin these days.
A quick search for the shortest celebrity marriages of all time — you know — those celebrities we often look up to, imitate, and want to be like — a search for the shortest celebrity marriages found that…
- Eddie Murphy was married to one woman for 14 days.
- Actor Dennis Hopper had a 9 day long marriage. One of Cher’s marriages lasted 9 days as well. Along with Carmen Electra and Dennis Rodman’s marriage.
- Nick Cage had a marriage that didn’t last a week — just 4 days.
- There’s Britney Spears and her 55 hour long marriage to the guy who tried to crash her most recent wedding.
- Only to be surpassed by Zsa Zsa Gbor’s marriage that lasted one day.
So what’s my point? We can’t look to the world — or to our culture and society — for our definition of what marriage is — what faithfulness is — of what it means to be a loving husband and wife — or even what it means to enjoy sex. We must turn elsewhere — to Scripture.
MAIN PASSAGE
So — as we turn to our passage from the Song of Songs — we’ll read of a faithful and passionate love between a husband and wife — a love that will point us to Jesus and his love for his bride — the Church. We’re in chapter 8 — beginning in verse 6.
“Set me as a seal upon your heart, as a seal upon your arm, for love is strong as death, jealousy is fierce as the grave. Its flashes are flashes of fire, the very flame of the Lord. 7 Many waters cannot quench love, neither can floods drown it. If a man offered for love all the wealth of his house, he would be utterly despised.” (Song of Songs 8:6-7 ESV)
Given that our book — for today — is a song — I thought it’d be good for us to remind ourselves of how much music has influenced our idea of what love is. Did you know that there’ve been more than 100 million love songs written? Wow, right?
There are love songs about new relationships, love songs about break-ups, love songs about being devoted to each other, love songs about making up after a fight, and — to quote one website — “songs galore about sex and seduction.”
But it seems that — by far — the most popular love songs are the ones about heartbreak — because — all of us — single, married, divorced — Christian or not — all of us have experienced love that’s not ideal, haven’t we? Yet we can all imagine a pure, perfect love that’s eluded us.
And the reason why you can imagine such a love — again regardless if you’re a Christian or not — is because we’ve all been created to love and to be loved in a way this world fails to offer. To love and be loved in a way that we’ve all failed to offer to others. No wonder there are so many love songs about heartbreak, right? We’re all longing to be loved while realizing that something’s gone very wrong — something so wrong that it’s broken our ability to love and to be loved.
But — if we know something’s gone wrong with love — we’re left with some questions.
For example “what is love?” Is love a choice? Is it a feeling? Is love unconditional or conditional? And how do you know — if all you know is that something’s gone wrong with love?
For instance, the majority of us want others to love us unconditionally. But — based on how well they love us — then we’ll decide how committed we’ll be to loving them. Meaning — we naturally default to a “You love me unconditionally but my love for you is conditional” kind of posture. Or what about sacrificial love. The idea of sacrificial love is still appreciated by our culture — just as long as you’re the one sacrificing for me, right?
Now — hear me out. Desiring to be loved unconditionally isn’t a bad thing. In fact, I don’t know that you can ignore your desire to be loved unconditionally — the same is true for our appreciation of sacrificial love. And this is where the Christian faith offers something that you won’t find anywhere else. What’s that you ask?
Though we’re all caught up in only knowing how to offer some sort of conditional love — all while desiring to be loved unconditionally — the Christian faith reveals to us that the love God has for us in Christ Jesus — is unconditional — and — it’s a sacrificial love.
But — and this may surprise you about God’s love — his love for you is a passionate love. And maybe even more surprising than that — his love for you is a jealous love. And — though God’s love is unconditional — this doesn’t mean his love for you will leave you unchanged. For — in being loved by God — in really knowing and understanding what it means to be loved by God’s unconditional love — is to be changed. You can’t help but be changed because you’ve finally found the love you’ve been searching for which results in you becoming someone completely new — someone with a new identity — someone who is loved.
And because you’re loved you now want to please the One who loves you — which requires change because — as we’ve seen — our love is broken — so it must be changed.
And the love God has for you is so powerful that it completely transforms the one who receives it so that we can actually be people who love him and others as we were created to.
WHAT IT MEANS TO BE LOVED
So — let’s return to our Song — and see what it means to be loved by God. We’re in verse 6.
“Set me as a seal upon your heart, as a seal upon your arm, for love is strong as death, jealousy is fierce as the grave. Its flashes are flashes of fire, the very flame of the Lord. 7 Many waters cannot quench love, neither can floods drown it. If a man offered for love all the wealth of his house, he would be utterly despised.” (Song of Songs 8:6-7 ESV)
In our verses we learn a few things about love. For instance, we learn that the love we all long for is a permanent love. It’s a love that’s been sealed — like the covenants mentioned earlier — we desire a love that’s guaranteed to never end. In verse six the woman says, “set me as a seal upon your heart.”
The word ‘seal’ “refers to an engraved stone used for authenticating a document or other possession. This stone could be suspended by a cord around the neck [which would hang] over the heart. The word…can also refer to a ‘seal ring’ worn on the hand” to stamp ownership or to seal a letter or to secure legally binding documents such as contracts. The woman — here in the Song — is expressing her desire to be treated as a precious treasure — to be sealed — showing she belongs uniquely to her lover.” And — just as fierce as the grave is at having a permanent hold on those who die — she wants his love to have this kind of permanent and lasting hold on her. A desire — I think — we can all relate to — the desire to be permanently loved.
Additionally, the love being described is unquenchable — there’s a passion to it. If love is going to be permanent — if it’s never-ending — we don’t want it to be a passionless love, right? Like a red hot flame of fire — the woman desires the love of her husband to be red hot — so fiery hot that not even a flood of water can extinguish it.
And — finally — this kind of love can’t be bought. Sex can be bought, relationships can be bought — but the love we all long for can’t be bought. This kind of love is priceless — it’s a gift that must be both given and received.
THE LOVE OF JESUS
Now — all of these qualities of love — a love that’s a seal — meaning it’s permanent — a love that’s unquenchable — a love that can’t be bought — are all qualities that should be found in the love between a husband and wife — these are qualities of love that should be found in a marital covenant. And the reason for this is because — ultimately — what Scripture teaches us is that earthly martial love is pointing us to another love — to a heavenly marital love between Christ and his bride — the Church. Like the quote we read earlier — earthly marital love serves as “a signpost to point to the greater love that lies beyond it.” And we find this greater love by turning to the New Testament — to Paul’s words to the Christians living in Ephesus. In Ephesians chapter 5 we read…
“Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord. 23 For the husband is the head of the wife even as Christ is the head of the church, his body, and is himself its Savior. 24 Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit in everything to their husbands. 25 Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, 26 that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, 27 so that he might present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish. 28 In the same way husbands should love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. 29 For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ does the church, 30 because we are members of his body. 31 “Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.” 32 This mystery is profound, and I am saying that it refers to Christ and the church. 33 However, let each one of you love his wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband.” (Ephesians 5:22-33 ESV)
Here — Paul — who was never married, by the way — shows us what the mystery — as he calls it — what the mystery of the covenant of marriage is. He tells us what marriages are meant to help everyone see — Christ’s covenant with his people. A covenant he fulfilled even when it cost him his life — for Christ’s love for his bride is a sacrificial love. He gave himself — on the cross — in love — for his people. And through the sacrifice of his blood — we’ve been cleansed of our sins and made holy, pure, and spotless — we’ve been washed. Thus the purpose of all earthly marriages is to point all people to the Heavenly marriage. The purpose of earthly love is to point all people to the love God has for them in Christ Jesus.
If you’re married — this is the ultimate purpose of your marriage — to point the world to Christ’s marriage to the Church. Thus a loveless or lifeless marriage proclaims a false gospel — for it’s not showing the world the love Christ has for his people. This is why living as if you’re married — while not being married — is a proclamation of a false gospel. This is why all of us — who believe in Jesus — married or single — are to live holy lives that proclaim the Good News of God’s love for his people.
And the love that Jesus has for his Bride — the Church — is a love that’s permanent — it’s a love that’s been sealed — guaranteed to never come to an end. For as we read in Scripture, “It is God who enables us, along with you, to stand firm for Christ. He has commissioned us, 22 and he has identified us as his own by placing the Holy Spirit in our hearts as the first installment that guarantees everything he has promised us.” (2 Corinthians 1:21-22 NLT)
Every promise of Scripture will be yours through faith in Jesus Christ. Not because of anything you’ve done — not because you deserve such blessing — but because of what Christ has done — in love — on your behalf. And all of this is guaranteed because of the Holy Spirit who lives in you and has done so since the day you first believed.
For — as we read elsewhere in Scripture — “And when you believed in Christ, he identified you as his own by giving you the Holy Spirit, whom he promised long ago. 14 The Spirit is God’s guarantee that he will give us the inheritance he promised and that he has purchased us to be his own people.
He did this so we would praise and glorify him.” (Ephesians 1:13b-14 NLT)
In believing in Jesus Christ — you’ve been sealed by the Holy Spirit — who is the guarantee that you will inherit all of the promises of God being fulfilled. What great love God has for you!
And the love that Jesus has for his Bride — the Church — is a love that is passionate. This is why his wrath should not offend us. When Jesus went into the Temple and got angry because he saw the house of his Father being disgraced — it was his passionate love for his Father that compelled him to flip over tables and drive people out of the Temple.
Passionate love protects the one it loves — for passionate love is a jealous love. Not in the sense we usually think of when we think of jealousy — where we envy others — but a jealousy that’s fiercely protective.
Jesus’ love for his people is fiercely protective. This is why he went to the cross — to defeat our greatest enemies of Satan, sin, death, and Hell. This is why sin is a big deal — why your sin is a big deal — for your sin is why Christ died for you. And he is so protective of you — and so values you — that he gave his life in love for you.
Which reminds us that the love that Jesus has for his Bride — the Church — is a love that can’t be bought — though it’s a costly love — for it cost Jesus his life. And it’s a love that will cost you your life. For — in being loved by Christ — you’re no longer your own — for you’ve been bought with a high price and you now belong to him. You’re united to him. You’re awakened to his love for you and — in response — love him in return. Loving him sacrificially and passionately. Knowing that his love is something you could never have purchased — and his love is something you could never have earned — for his love is something only freely given by the One who’s infinitely more than simply a great model of what it means to love others — but is love himself.
CONCLUSION
If you’re new to Gateway — something you’ll hear me say often — like all of the time often — are the words “God loves you.” And my hope — for all of us — is that these would not be words that are received without a passion being stirred up inside of us.
- For the words “God loves you” are passionate words.
- Red hot fire words.
- Life changing words.
- Sacrificial love inspiring words.
- Going to the ends of the earth to proclaim the gospel motivating words.
- Loving our spouses so our marriages proclaim the gospel stimulating words.
- Loving Jesus and serving his Church and the world regardless of our marital status electrifying words.
- Pursuing holiness kind of words.
I hope you see that being loved by God isn’t something that one can experience and not be changed by — for it’s impossible to be loved by God and remain the same. For the love of God — as revealed in the life, death, and resurrection of Jesus Christ — is spirit-uplifting, soul-stirring, and heart-moving. And the words “God loves you” are words the Spirit of God uses to spur on the people of God to be the “world’s best lovers” — for we’re the people who’ve found what the world is searching for. For we’re the people who know what it means to be loved. Let’s pray.
PRAYER
Heavenly Father, what love you have for us. A permanent love. A passionate love. A jealous love. A love that can’t be bought — a love that came at a high price.
Spirit of God — seal upon our hearts the amazing truth that we are loved. If anyone listening to my voice doubts that they are loved — may you give them supernatural confidence and joy — right now — that they are loved by you. And ignite in them a flame so they respond to your love.
And — Jesus — to you we say thank you. Thank you for your unconditional love for us. For your sacrificial love for us. For your jealous love for us. For your protective love for us. For demonstrating to us that your love for us is the love we’ve been searching for. Help us to rest and trust in your love for us. And it’s in your name that we pray all of these things. Amen.
BENEDICTION /
May you go knowing that you are loved by God. Amen.
God loves you. I love you. You are sent.